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Playing in a mixed team league where fun is encouraged but I am out of ideas on how to handle these recurring scenarios which a few of the players resort to one or all of these behaviors.
1) Going on more than the allotted smoke breaks
2) Yelling at you to miss
3) Standing, un-welcomed, on the line with your teammate while the winning double is trying to be thrown
4) Telling players before they are throwing for a double that they don't really want to win ... because they want you to win more games to beat a more hated team in the league in standings
5) Getting drunk
6) Waiting for over 5 minutes as no-one knows where they are .. we are in the middle of the game and its her turn
7) talking to her hubby the marker delaying the progress of the evening
I have had this individual do this to me and others in major tournaments and in fun league play.
Everyone hates but tolerates it.
Finally after 5 or 7 of these events taking place I decided to tell her that she was unsportsmanlike in her behavior. I was firm in my delivery of that statement.
She said she had alot of personal stuff on her plate ... of which I COLDLY feel belongs after darts ... before darts ... on a couch in an office with a professional ... with her Medical Doctor ... I dunno ... don't want to care really
Some people just want to win by any means.
Advice people advice ... how do we diffuse this.
When my teammate was asked whether he minded her on the line and bothering him ... my teammate had a choice to support me or this fair weather acquaintance ... he didn't answer truthfully as her tears swelled in her eyes. He decided to be compassionate ... as for me ... I am the bad guy ... so it feels.
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Tell her politely to stop all the nonsense, and if she still does it just tell her to yaba doo off
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if shes doing that she should be banned or forced to throw .... isnt there like a 2 minute time limit on throws so if shes gone 2 minutes that should have voided 2 throws?
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Well handled! I respect your restraint to be calm yet firm.
Much more polite than I would have been. Unfortunately I don't have much restraint or patience for idiocy.
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Don't look at yourself as being the "bad guy", it's more about good sportsmanship, consideration for your team mates AND opponents.
What this gal is doing is simply passive aggressive behavior combined with downright rude behavior to swing things in her favor and she should be called out on it. The longer she is allowed to get away with it, the longer it will continue and probably escalate.
I've played in a mixed league and there were some that played their games, but not to the extent you have mentioned, and it was not always the women. I think this drama queen needs to see a set of rules governing behavior expected by the league---if these rules exist. I know every league I've played in had a fairly comprehensive set of rules set down to govern how players, chalkers, etc. were expected to behave. I suggest you get a copy and hand them to her and see if that makes any impact. If not, dump her, because she's obvious a hopeless cause.
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Get rid of her for good, give her a final warning if you want but that would be my last chance.
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(01-30-2015, 03:12 PM)gumbo2176 Wrote: Don't look at yourself as being the "bad guy", it's more about good sportsmanship, consideration for your team mates AND opponents.
What this gal is doing is simply passive aggressive behavior combined with downright rude behavior to swing things in her favor and she should be called out on it. The longer she is allowed to get away with it, the longer it will continue and probably escalate.
I've played in a mixed league and there were some that played their games, but not to the extent you have mentioned, and it was not always the women. I think this drama queen needs to see a set of rules governing behavior expected by the league---if these rules exist. I know every league I've played in had a fairly comprehensive set of rules set down to govern how players, chalkers, etc. were expected to behave. I suggest you get a copy and hand them to her and see if that makes any impact. If not, dump her, because she's obvious a hopeless cause.
The rules are there. We tolerate her because her hubby is a well respected BUT is losing respect.
I dont want the job of kicking her out. I dont want to feel this way of being distracted around them. Why cant we simply get along and play fair?
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Sounds like her husband should be the one stepping in. She's making him look like an arse
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(01-30-2015, 02:45 PM)Grey Owl Wrote: 5) Getting drunk
I always play drunk!!! Lol.
I'm the kind of person that I simply get chatty when drunk... I do not get belligerent, or violate any of the other no-nos mentioned.
Some people don't belong near the dartboard.
-Milky
Keeping dart retailers in business since 2012.
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(01-30-2015, 06:05 PM)Milkysunshine Wrote: (01-30-2015, 02:45 PM)Grey Owl Wrote: 5) Getting drunk
I always play drunk!!! Lol.
I'm the kind of person that I simply get chatty when drunk... I do not get belligerent, or violate any of the other no-nos mentioned.
Some people don't belong near the dartboard.
You are so right !
Mmmm .. what I really meant to say was .. Nasty Drunk .. not the smiling, chatty, happy ones !!!!
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Ayup Comrade
I have a word with her husband, its about time he man'd up and got his wife straightend out.
Or they both leave the league/ team, tough but fair.
Shed
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I would approach the hubby on the quiet and have a word...just say it has been brought to your attention by a few people.tell him people have threatened to walk if it continues so it has to be dealt with...you don't want her to not have an escape but she needs to do it respectfully and if she wants to just go pissed and start trouble,politely direct her to the front door with your boot
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01-30-2015, 07:43 PM
(This post was last modified: 01-30-2015, 07:43 PM by Regulatori.)
Hmm...not sure I would approach the husband. He's either....
A: Completely whipped and has no control over her. He'll then most likely tattle on you (and she'll get more annoying that "you're talking behind my back.")
B: One of those "My wife can do no wrong" types that will instantly get defensive/Mr Tough Guy. You see this all the time with kids that misbehave...you go talk to the mother and she's always the ultra-defensive my-kid-can-do-no-wrong/everyone else is the problem types.
I just don't understand how people can tolerate it. Does your league have any board members that can be contacted and put her on some type of disciplinary probation? Like if she continues the antics, she's out of the leagues...3 strikes you're out.
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What bothers me a lot is a wife talking to her husband, who is marking score. So I took matters into my own hands and started throwing anyways. She didn't talk to him anymore,lol.
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(01-30-2015, 02:59 PM)eammoncass Wrote: if shes doing that she should be banned or forced to throw .... isnt there like a 2 minute time limit on throws so if shes gone 2 minutes that should have voided 2 throws?
3 mins.
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